What has shaped me

I grew up moving around a lot so it was tough finding a sense of identity so I struggled with that a lot as a kid but the one thing that was constant was mom. We were extremely close even if I wouldnt get to see her all the time. When she was working and couldn't take me with her I would stay with family in Africa, France, or in US with close family friends or my uncle who would be there. My mother grew up in a muslim home in africa, she was raised with little emotional support so that it turn turned to me and we had to struggle together trying to find our way through our life’s and we still are. My mother had to deal with raising a child as a single mother and I had to realise that not everyone didn’t have a dad. As I got older and went through puberty I had to learn to be independant and not have to rely on others as much as most. I grew up fast and missed some of my childhood due to moving and switching schools and such. Music was a big part of my life and even though my mother and step-father didn’t play any instrument really or sing I had still had a constant stream of music. Either from going to Grateful Dead tributes or when my mother played Edith Piaf or Bob Marley at home it was there. I started voice lessons and violin lesson and that really shaped me to learn that music could help relieve stress or pent up emotions. Another turning point in my life when I went into highschool, I was a freshman and just a little sheltered and I was weak emotionally and was battling depression on my own with little help from family members and, since I never learned how to express emotions I couldn't take to my friends as much as I would have wanted or really needed, I was susceptible to outside influences and I ended up getting myself in a bad situation and overdosing. That taught me nothing is really going to help me if its all I have. I learned to cope in a safer way and learned my lesson.